story

The Perfect Life

Giulia

The Perfect Life

Does anyone have a perfect life? What is perfection? What is life…?

Well if you ask me, then yes, I would say that there are people who have perfect lives. And not because they live in a continuous happiness, or because they were born rich and healthy and are popular.
Most of us think of happiness in terms of needs: the need for food, for shelter, for a partner to share the biological needs with, for support, social life, fame – on a smaller or on a larger scale, and some self esteem. Doesn’t that sound like a perfect life… to have all those? Is there anything one could ask more for? Sure, we would add: love, kindness, friendships, inner peace… And still, is that all we need to be happy? No, this is perfection…

What is life? Stupid question, ones might say. Well life is a fact. That’s it, you wake up one morning and your brain is developed enough to acknowledge that you are alive. And when that moment comes, you start worrying, you’re not a baby or a child anymore, to let others take care of your life and guide you; and that’s how real life starts, you feel responsible for what’s happening to your body, for how others feel about you, for your grades in school, for the deadlines at your job and for what your parents and friends might say if you stop following the unwritten guidelines of this journey. Day by day, you feel life.

Now let’s see. A perfect life is a life without worries. But there isn’t such a thing, is it? To have a perfect life would mean that you were not actually acknowledging the fact that you are living, you’d act like a plant: here comes the sun, let’s produce some chlorophyll so we can “eat”, wait for the rain, and get numb when the sun goes down.

Dreams
But I was so convinced that there is a perfect life! So how should it be then? I’m thinking of “being satisfied with what you have would make you happy and live a perfect life”, but that’s just silly, as so many people are homeless and starve to death around the world. On the other hand, thinking that “you should always aim for more, never rest from chasing your dreams, so you can reach happiness and self satisfaction, never ever give up” might lead to a happy life in terms of being a strong ambitious person. But that’s also wrong, because people tend to have crazy aspirations, convinced that those would make them have a perfect life and they end up at that point where they can only see the past and the present, being so old and tired that the future means nothing to them, they live from memories and get to think “how I wasted my life, how stupid was I!”

About two years ago I went to a zoo and I was cheerful to see more than my natural environment could provide. The attraction of the season was a baby gorilla, recently captured and put in its new “home”. It lived in a huge cage, with plenty of food and water and green stuff, obviously put there to make it believe it was in its “dream house”. But it looked so depressed… tourists would try to take pictures and poke the glass to draw its attention, but the big brown eyes were wet and sad… So I thought that nothing would ever make that poor soul enjoy life again, that’s not perfect at all for it…

This year I got the chance of visiting again that zoo. On the way out, I remembered the baby gorilla I was telling you about and with a bit of nervousness I went checking what has happened to it. I was surprised to see a huge black creature, jumping around and literally making faces at the cheerful crowd. It couldn’t have been it… So I had to ask. It was that baby gorilla.

So I got to think about it… How come it was happy? Is adaptation what it takes to get a happy life? Well the only conclusion I got was that you don’t need to hold on insanely to things in the past… Sure, sometimes it is very hard. Letting go of your dreams might be close to impossible, but it is worth it, to hang on and stay sad? So I’m figuring that a perfect happy life is achieved when one is strong enough to accept reality, but also keep faith and follow the dreams which come close to what they have always wanted… I think that perfect life results from harmony.

 
Harmony flower

A Puppy’s Story

Giulia

A Puppy's Story


The bell from the petshop door rings for the 35th time today. A 7 year old girl, all dressed in pink, with curly hair and ribbons walks in, with her parents. She’s wearing a girly purse, far too big for her arm, but all shiny and with a spoiled child’s attitude, drags her dad’s hand to hurry up. Her mom is a skinny woman, in a a business outfit and her dad holds the keys to a Mercedes Benz. I smile, thinking of a new opportunity for Soul.

“We want a pet for our daughter”, the man said. This is our chance! I walk them politely to the small shelter where the puppies are. Only three left. The girl already spots Soul and tries to pick him up, while the other two puppies joyfully walk to the small hand, waggling their tails. But Soul looks special, with his brown nose and blue eyes…too bad that those baby blue marbles don’t function well…Then I told them that the puppy is blind. The girl immediately puts it down with a “getting rid of” gesture and the mom wrinkles her nose in disgust. Soul tries to find his way back in the corner, sniffing around, taking small insecure steps. He bumps into another puppy, then finally finds the way back. My eyes get wet at the scene, because I saw it too many times…When will I learn my lesson? Rich people want perfect pets. But Soul is perfect…he offers more love and tenderness than any other puppy we had.

The rough voice of the man brings me back to reality, from my deep thoughts: “We’ll take this one!”. Trying to smile, I suggest the best accessories needed for a puppy and charge. I want to see them out as soon as possible. Another disappointment.

All the people walking in this store pick up Soul first, because he is such an adorable puppy, but all put him down after they find out about his blindness…He is so young still, and can already manage fine by using his senses, he’s playful and loyal…And he has a low price, not because he is not worth even more than the other puppies, but because we want a real home for him…

Preparing to close the shop, the door bell rings again. It’s a young boy and a strange looking lady. Trying to look busy and let them know that we are closing, I start cleaning the front desk. The boy picks up Soul, and with a dry voice I just tell him that the puppy is blind. The woman tells the kid to pick the other one then, but the boy is holding Soul tight. I don’t even bother to look, because I am too familiar with the scene. I just want them to leave. But then something drags my attention…

“You think that only because some have small handicaps they don’t deserve to be loved? Or that they can’t offer love? This puppy is just like me, aunty, and I want him!”. The woman tries to say something, but the boy continues, while on his cheeks crystal clear tears roll over…”I know how it is to be abandoned because you’re not perfect. Maybe he doesn’t have parents either, maybe nobody wants him, but I do…” I found myself staring like a fool, with enlarged eyes and my cleaning products spilled on the desk…

They are approaching now to pay for Soul…I must pull myself together. Ok, here comes the smile…Good. “Are you sure you want this puppy, young man?”. Is that my voice? It is…As a response, the boy frowns at me, holding Soul tighter.

I give the sweet puppy a goodbye kiss, knowing that he is going to be loved. Walking out of my petshop, I finally have time to analyse the two strange humans…The boy was dragging a wooden leg, but his face was glowing and Soul was licking it with joy…

A Wild Soul – The Amazing Story of a Lion

Giulia

A Wild Soul - The Amazing Story of a Lion


I used to be happy. Those memories are pretty blurry now, but, like scars, engraved in my heart. And I will never forget that day…I was just a cub, running happily next to my mother and brothers with all the excitement someone discovering the world can have, in the green tall grass, under the clear blue sky and through the hot dry air. I was learning about my nature and discovering my instincts. But the process ended in a blink of an eye…

After that day, I can only remember steel bars and depressed creatures around me. Humans thought that being so young, this zoo will rapidly become my home and I will adapt, being playful and entertaining for the visitors. I adapted, sure, physically, as I never grew up to be one of those healthy lions with shiny fur or nicely developed muscles. My eyes were always calm and I rarely new anger in here, because the sadness in my heart never left room for any other feelings. I adapted, waiting patiently, to be fed with a piece of smelly meet. I learned to control my thirst until I could receive some fresh water.

I was told that lions are kings, but this world has proven differently. I am just a prisoner. My soul is trapped between two worlds: one that I can never forget and one that I can never escape from. I’ve been told that this is home, but how can these brainless beings call “home” a place that takes away the most important thing one can have…After so many years, ironically, being in such a small place, I have learned a lot. I have learned that when others can harm you, anger won’t help. That will only starve you. I have learned that being calm and gentle might make them give you treats. And I have learned that I hate it when they come in packs, point at me and flash that strong light in my eyes, to have a “memory”.

They usually come with their babies and are very noisy and excited. But from time to time, it happens to see one male or female human, alone, staring and trying to communicate with me. And I sense the sadness and despair in their voices, trying to ease their souls to someone like me…a poor fallen king. And then I sense fear of their own world, of their own failures and mistakes. And those are the moments that should please me the most, by taking an unfair revenge of those who put me here…But I feel pity and frustration, and I wish I could scream and tell them what fools they are. Humans, nothing is impossible for you! You have the most valuable and precious thing in this world…You have your freedom! You have friends and families, you have where to run wild if you want to. But these people I’ve seen made me think that they were the real captives, captives of their own fears and suspicions.

Feeling unable to make them see the reality, I acted friendly, at least to let them know that I understand… I have no other means of being nice to trapped souls, but humans can help each other see the light, not the darkness. And I wish I could tell humans that true friends in life are not the ones who say that they understand…but the ones who shout at you, angrily, to get up and fight…and to cherish your freedom, because freedom is like a magical tree, with new branches and leaves every day…but be careful not to cut the roots.

I am old now. I don’t know how old. I can barely move anymore and I stopped seeing the flashes of the “memories” taken by people. But my soul is running free like in that far away day… And I wish I could have that just one more time… I could have never guessed that it will become just a faint memory… There are so many things I would have done, if I only knew…

The Day That Changed My Life

Giulia

The Day That Changed My Life

Photo by ekeidar


East-european winters are always cold. Every January freezes my blood at the first breath I take outside, in the early foggy mornings when I have to get to work. The cold makes you cover even your nose, to avoid the painful sting of the frost when you breathe in.

It was one of those mornings when I just wanted to call my boss to tell him that I quit, because it was inhuman to walk in 10 centimeters of snow in a time of the day when you could only distinguish everything as shadows, because the sun refused to show up. But the common sense was ringing bells in my head so I kept walking. I was never more anxious to get to the bus station and I started making “warm” wishes to the bank which was delaying my credit for the car ridiculously much.

Swearing in my head and thinking of all the work I had to do at the office, I was fully awake now. But I had a few seconds of doubt about it, when I heard a low faint voice from the corner of the gray building which was waiting to be demolished for over a year now. “Don’t worry”, it said, “we’re gonna survive this one too…”. I stopped. My first thought was to quickly search for some small change to give it to the begger, but turning to see the exact source of the voice, I saw an old woman petting a dog. I couldn’t tell which one of the two looked more awful and skinny. The ground where they stood was without snow, covered in newspapers, and an old smelly blanket, with so many holes in it, that you could barely call it a blanket. The woman didn’t seem to notice me and I was staring like a fool. She took a loaf of bread from a small plastic bag and gave it all to the dog. The poor creature was drooling at it, but only took a bite. Then it waited. But the woman seemed to encourage it, saying “go on, eat it all, it’s your turn this morning”, pushing the loaf towards to dog again.

Without even thinking, I searched my bag, always full of useless stuff, like mirrors and lipsticks and all sorts of bills and found the sandwich I had prepared for my office lunch, as I was usually too busy to take a real lunch break. And I gave it to the woman. Without being able to say a word, seeing my bus I started running, forgetting how slippery my shoes were.

All day I could only hear the woman’s words and her sparkly eyes after I gave my sandwich. That day I had a real break at noon and ate even the desert. When I got back home, the woman was gone…the dog was staring at everyone who passed by, then with a disappointed sad look, started smelling the blanket. The next morning I took with me 3 sandwiches, but again I only saw the dog. I left them there, but the poor animal didn’t even touch them.

After a couple of days, my neighbour paid me a visit and I told him the what happened since that morning. With his black eyebrows raised, he asked me “What? You don’t know the story?”. So he told me that the dog found the begger in that corner one night, almost frozen and it laid cuddled next to her, to keep each other warm. It practically saved her life and they started sharing the bread and the blanket from that day…But after that morning when I first saw them, she died and was taken away…And the dog refused by all means to eat or abandon that corner and the blanket…I gave him food in the first days, but it refused to eat…so I stopped. And after a while I didn’t see it anymore…

That day changed my life and made me wake up more cheerful, enjoy my lunch break and a ride by bus. That day made me see the beauty of my life and be thankful for what I have and for what I can do, every moment.

Unfair Revenge

Giulia

Unfair Revenge


The crowd is heavily applauding. Look at all those rose petals again spreading the wonderful subtle fragrance in the air! And the happy glowing faces…All that emotion and excitement made them shine with sweat. “Oscar wins again!!!” a man shouts counting his earned money from the bets he placed in this race. And those flashing lights all around him and the fresh flower garlands around his neck!

Closing his eyes, the horse waited a moment for his usual treats of sugar and the soft pets on his wet neck…And he waited a few more moments…Then the memories disappeared. Looking around, he once again saw the dark empty stable. The other race horses were in the big sheds, being taken good care of, with excellent food and nice word and that pet on the neck, while he was having wet hey. Oscar’s glorious days were over, he wasn’t the fastest horse in the competitions anymore. In fact, he couldn’t even participate by looking because nobody took him out of there now. In the first few weeks after the incident, he was happy when someone remembered that he’s still alive and needs walking. But moving very slow and getting tired after a few steps, his “walkers” got bored and decided they had better things to do than looking after a handicapped horse.

And now he was alone with an almost blind pony at the other corner of the stable and two skinny donkeys. But they weren’t very good company, they couldn’t understand how it was to have everything one day, and the next to feel like you lost more than you ever had. He could endure the sufferings during the day, because pricking his ears Oscar could hear how the other horses run outside, how they graze and how their jockeys talk to them…And then he could dream that it was him out there, preparing for another winning. But at night…it was unbearable. That awful nightmare keeps stalking him, every night, every time he closes his eyes. After five minutes of sleeping, that man with a cut chin is there again, with his evil look and the long metal stick. Then that thunder that almost left Oscar deaf and then the pain in his leg and the red fluid! It all happened in a matter of seconds and he couldn’t understand why…but every time he tried to sleep he could live again those moments of real terror, with the strong pain and the same words, like an obsessing melody which meant nothing to him “because of you…my money…all the bets…pay for it”.

Then he opens his eyes, but the surroundings don’t get less darker. And that silence is almost hurting his ears and soul. He could never understand what humans are able to do for money, he could never understand why he was abandoned when he was ill, he could never understand what revenge is. His calm round eyes still got wet when someone came to bring the poor food and give some water and he was still hoping for a change…He was hoping that one day someone would talk to him again and feel the encouraging tone once more…But after his leg got infected and cut off, the only words he heard again were: “ Come on boy, we need to move more ponies here, kids will enjoy the rides…Your time is over.”

And then he felt a sting in his neck and the nightmares and memories were gone forever…

A Budgie’s Devotion

Giulia

A Budgie's Devotion

March is always cheerful. Even more for Bob. This morning he was woken up unusually early, to his excitement. He was so tired and bored of the green blanket covering his cage, with the purpose of keeping him quiet at the sun rise. In some sort of miraculous way, today he could see daylight way sooner. And he was singing and mumbling something with excitement, hitting softly the tiny bell he had, to draw attention and announce that he wants to be let out and play in the room. But not all wishes come true at once…

Before he could entirely realize it, Bob was in an even bigger cage, a weird one. He was in two cages now and kinda lost the excitement of the early morning…All confused, he stood still and tried to guess his master’s plans. No longer than 10 minutes and the huge cage started moving forward, with Bob to the left of his master’s chair. Losing orientation, the blue budgie started squeeking and flying around in circles. But then a voice told him “Don’t worry Bob, we’re just going on a trip. For today you’ll be a good birdy and stay there and tomorrow we’ll be already in Eastern Europe and you can play in a new room with Duck”.

Calmed down by the “baby talk” voice, Bob could stop and observe the things around him better now. So this speeding huge cage has some of those glass walls too, like the room he grew up in…And how weird it looked…The grey blocks disappeared and he could only see trees and some other moving cages on the strange path they were following. It was…fascinating and his tiny brain could not fully decide if he should be happy or worried. But he decided to be happy and without a worry, as he never had a hard time with his master.

Then a cold shiver ran through his tail. The seeds! And Duck! He quickly looked around. The food was there, he had plenty. And…Duck? Where was his dear plastic friend…the tiny rubber duck that he shared everything with, that always listened to him? Even though that strange yellow bird was almost his size, she never changed facial expression. Always with blue calm eyes, staring straight at him. But Duck was always there…and now Bob couldn’t spot her! Even if one of her blue eyes was only half blue now, because on an overexcitement moment, he bit her while playing and the colored paint got erased, she still had to be there always! Then he started flying again in circles making loud unbearable noises. The huge cage stopped, but the blue budgie was still restless. He wasn’t curious to see what’s after the glass wall or why the cage stopped moving, he didn’t even respond to his master’s calm words. Duck was missing, couldn’t he see? They had to go back and postpone the trip, wherever their destination was. Duck was gone, she was missing! Dumb as she was, he was decided not to go anywhere without her.

When a hand reached after him, he knew a kiss was about to come on his fluffy head with blue and white feathers, but he bit the hand and squeeked louder “DUCK!”. Nothing mattered anymore…the new environment, the beautiful early morning, the seeds or the running cage…Seeing that they start moving again, without his beloved friend, Bob stood helpless on the bars of his cage, with a sad look and without a sound…They must have been travelling for days, because he got really bored…No one to talk to, no one to bite and share feelings about the trip with…Still the dark didn’t come once…

After a real hour or so, the huge cage with glass walls stopped again and a sweet voice was reaching his tiny holes which served as ears, on the side of his head: “Now now Bob, don’t be sad, you cute thingy…I know someone who can cheer you up! “. And as a miracle, Duck entered his cage, bouncing in the hand of his owner…So she was there! In a blink of an eye, Bob jumped on the yellow rubber object and started cuddling, mumbling something with joy. It will be a perfect March day…!

A Dog’s Sacrifice

Giulia

A Dog's Sacrifice


It was clouded all of a sudden. The clear blue got covered with dark heavy clouds but the air was dry. Not a rain drop, not a thunder nor a wind breeze. The last hen in yard was struggling with a small worm. The tiny bastard refuses with an admirable stubbornness to get out of the dried out soil. Since Joseph’s crops finished, it had to find the food by itself. Besides, the other poultry was eaten months ago and there was not much to do alone. So searching for food occupied the whole day of the brainless bird.

On the last step of the house the man in his 60’s, or maybe 80’s…you couldn’t tell for sure, that’s how tormented his face was, sat petting his big friend on the black fur. The eyes of the animal were restless and unpatient. Ever since Joseph found the massive dog with a broken leg abandoned next to the railways and took him home, a silent friendship was born. The man rarely spoke and when he did, it was with a faint voice, petting the dog and sharing his bread. But the animal understood somehow. He didn’t bark once in the past five months since he was there, as a sign of respect for his savior and new master.

But today something strange was in the air and Dog ( as he was always called ) could feel it. The hand on his head was resting now, giving up the petting motions and the other hand of the man was holding his forehead. “What will we eat tomorrow…?” The sky got darker but still no rain. Dog raised his head every 30 seconds and looked at the line of the horizon, as waiting for something to happen. Then he looked at the hen. The worm still wasn’t out yet.

Then Dog stood up and started barking loudly, like the devil was chasing him. He was turned towards Joseph and blocked the entrance of the house, showing his sharp white teeth. With a stunned and frightened look, Joseph got up and took one step back. He tried to pass by Dog and enter the house, but the animal was a few centimeters close of biting him, with an anger and rage the man hasn’t seen before in his life, not even when he was hunting furious bears. He understood then. Dog was rabid. Moving away from the door of the house, the animal seemed to become more calm, but still stood there guarding the entrance. Trying to talk to him, Joseph had a few attempts to get closer, but the result was the same…The massive beast started barking and tried to bite. The scene could freeze someone’s blood and even the stupid hen forgot about the worm and ran to the back of the yard, bouncing its round body on the skinny legs.

With the saddest look a man can be capable of, Joseph knew that there was no alternative…Rabid dogs can’t be cured and they only suffer more alive…His old hunting gun was in the empty stable and he got it. Dog’s eyes had a weird wet expression of love and furry at the same time. Without a word, but with a small heavy heart, Joseph shot his friend. The body collapsed in the door way and the dry dust formed a small cloud around it. Sitting in the yard like a fool, staring at what he had done, a strong force shook the ground and Joseph fell unconscious, hitting his head.

It must have been half an hour or so when he got up and saw…There had been an earthquake and the house collapsed… He could see Dog’s tail between the ruins…He thought he had understood before…but he was wrong…The animal paid back the favor of saving a life, as he sensed the disaster coming. Then Joseph knew that he could have been dead in his house if it hadn’t been for his furry friend…And a cold tear rolled down his wrinkled cheek…The hen was back now, looking for its worm…